So I finally saw a new pdoc a few weeks ago which was pretty tough, at least I seem to get along with her ok so far. I've been diagnosed with all sorts in the past, she didn't diagnose me on the first visit which I think is good, there's a lot going on with me as she said and needed me to document everything for a few weeks. Moods, feelings, everything.

I've had some major down days, mixed days, it's really weird seeing it all in a diary form. I think I'm getting nervous to what will happen tomorrow. She hasn't given me any new meds yet, just wanted me to document what I take and how it makes me feel no matter what it is. I've been off Prozac almost 3 wks with a couple of small doses to kill the withdrawals a bit inbetween. It's strange being almost unmedicated. Well except valium, threw in a seroquel on a night my brain wouldn't shut up and all of the intrusive thoughts.

Not sure what I'm posting about entirely. Feeling like I'll just get shoved out the door like old docs have done with no meds or idea what to do. Or give me fatteners which is no good for someone with an ED.

I've had some pretty scary mood swings though. Intense anger out of nowhere almost and it's never been that bad. Then to crying, I'm a bit all over the place. Felt happy today and now I'm just flat again.

Oh and so far her non diagnoses' she can see signs of bipolar, bpd, anxiety, but didn't see my depression as I was good at putting on my 'happy mask' which I can do A LOT in public.