((baker007)) - I'm very sorry for what you're going through and you've already received some great advice...especially from Bill3. He's right you're being emotionally blackmailed. I have experience with manipulators - one was my MIL and so is my husband. Your mother had made you feel too responsible for her happiness. She's too involved in your life and you shouldn't have to do this much for her. She has a husband and your brother should have been doing his share.

You have your own life and she should only be a small influence now you're an adult. For her to do this emotional game while you're pregnant is very cruel. She has serious emotional problems, where she's orchestrated this kind of dependence on you. This is a boundary problem too -you need to stand your ground and she needs to respect your boundaries. Tell your dad, she's welcome but you won't tolerate this anymore. Your mom is kissing up to your brother, because she's probably doing the same manipulation on him. What kind of mother encourages her children to feel jealous of each other and pits them against each other?

She wants you to beg and do what she wants but you're an adult. She wants a reaction, so the best thing for a person like this is, not to give them one. For the present moment take care of yourself and this pregnancy. It sounds like you have a great husband. Let her be stubborn. I understand you feel devastated because she never cut the apron strings..... she was working the benefits. I know this type and they'll put you through hell unless you establish firm boundaries. Congratulations on being pregnant and this baby is number 1 priority. You can rely on us for support. Best of luck