Well...

thank you for teaching us all a new term... very helpful

I write a lot and it is easier for me than reading because writing is more active and so it grabs my brain more so I do not go into rumination about my issues. When I read fiction, I do not get grabbed by the plot enough - I keep ruminating.

.... however... audiobooks to the rescue! It is much easier to get absorbed into the plot and narrative if a professional narrator does the job of reading... at least for me, so I recommend that you try.

In any event, I can think of lots of things that you could be doing that are so much worse - take self-injury, for instance. So you are fine!