(((ouch))) I'm sorry that you are feeling so overwhemed and confused ... trust me when i say i know those feelings all too well too. Just know that you are not alone, and that you CAN handle it ... no matter how much life sucks at times, you are strong and you can get through this.
As for the being happy part though ... i really can't help you there, but just try and do things for you. Try not to let what other people think influence what YOU do. Read a book, go for a walk, listen to your favourite music, anything that makes you feel even slightly more uplifted... it just might help to take the edge off a little bit, and make things more bearable.
Keep your head up, and believe that you are a good person, and are not even completely alone - not on here anyways.
Jacq