Thanks for the responses.

Genetic you're pretty spot on with your observation. I was adopted. My parents couldnt have children, so I think they were a little too eager and gave me too much.

I guess the most difficult part is breaking the cycle. Everyday I think that I want to change, but I dont make any major steps or do anything different at all really. I work a minimum of 48 hours a week over 6 days. Mostly second shift, so when I get out the only thing open are bars. I don't like to go back to my parents house and my childs mother and I are not very good together, which adds extra stress. I feel like I have no time or source of happiness (with the exception of my daughter, but the baggage her mother brings negates a lot of it). I understand a healthier lifestyle and focusing on self improvement would bring me long term happiness and self satisfaction, but I don't know how to climb out of my giant hole. I can never make a step forward without retracing it shortly after.

Thanks again for reading this and your feedback. I appreciate your time and thoughts.