Quote:
Originally Posted by txgirl55
So I am finally deciding to get some help. I have been dealing with depression, anxiety, stress all on my own for the last 5 years. I have a great poker face, and I just choose to keep everything inside. I just relocated to another state with my parents. I left, because I thought this was going to be a fresh start. I was going to find a better job, with better pay. Finally start saving up to be on my own. Well, turns out, I am miserable. Am I not giving it enough time? I cry almost everyday because I am nothing. I have nothing going for me. I try and work out, but I can't even stand to look at myself for more than a minute. I am not motivated for anything. I am sad all the time, and worst part is I can't talk to my parents about it. I am scared of talking to them about anything. All they do is laugh at me. They don't believe in me. I worry about what other people think, it stresses me out. I don't know how to be grateful for anything. I don't know how to stop all these crazy feelings inside of me. I have never felt this alone. The last time I felt really really alone, was when I was 5 years old. I am 24 now, and I am feeling like a confused, scared, little girl.
What do i do? I feel like giving up everyday. Because there is no point. I have no idea why I am on this planet. Every day just sucks.
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You`ve already taken a big step by seeking help..
I can understand how you are feeling I am 23 and I suppress my depression and anxiety too and that doesn`t make it go away. I feel as vulnerable too
It causes a lot of stress and my skin reacts to it too but I`ve been thinking about going for counselling too lately. Also I get the shakes when I feel intimidated or I am uneasy in social situations which makes things embarrassing for me at times.I tend to ruminate a lot about my unpleasant feelings which just makes me sink in deeper, so I try to focus on the little things that go right which can help a bit. I think it will help to see a T and it`s always worth the try. It can change your perspective of things and regulate your emotions. We all want to feel better
I know how it hurts to be rebuffed by people who are supposed to give you support especially if they are close ones. It causes a deeper wound. I got my share of that too but now I tend go towards those who understand and care for me like I care for them. Sometimes your parents do care but they have no understanding and they don`t see how their reactions can hurt you even when it`s very obvious..And given that your parents laugh at you when you confide in them , it affects how you relate to others as you fear the same reaction from others. But some people really do care and want to help out.
Take care