Whoops; sorry if I implied this was just a midlife thing. My intention was to suggest that the unfairness of how we get where we are and the anger that we feel becomes more clear and intense during that time.

Buddha path for me means taking comfort from believing that our human experience begins as series of patterns of impulses formed in our brain during our early years. The suffering and disappointment that we feel about or lives is a reaction not to what is but what we believe it is. And the path towards happiness involves contacting our witnessing self and seeing the transient thoughts and the emotions that they invoke as passing events with little significance.

Anyway that was my best effort at putting it into words. When we're experiencing self hatred and self criticism smarter people than me have shown that self kindness and self compassion are called for. This is a good place to start:

Self-compassion - A Healthier Way of Relating to Yourself