This is completely irrelevant to the other topic I posted tonight, but I logged onto Facebook before and it got me thinking.
I don't use Facebook much and I don't have anyone I'd class as "friends". At least, nobody who I'd consider worth hanging out with on a constant basis. But there are a couple of people who I used to be fairly close with who, quite frankly, make me feel a bit jealous and even angry that I'm not as happy as they are.

There is one person in particular. Her name is Karen. She was my best friend in university. One day I revealed to her I was suffering from depression, and she said she was too (her's mostly revolved around being overweight and hating herself for it). We really bonded after that, and became even closer friends. We'd even planned on leaving uni at the end of the year and moving in together so that we could get some money behind ourselves, and maybe even travel overseas. I was really excited about this because it was the first time in a long time that I had any long-term goals. I felt almost...happy.

Except...about a month before uni finished for the year, Karen quit uni. She said she was sick of it and wanted to move interstate with her sister. I was really upset. I'd been looking at houses, packing my things, and getting ready for the big move. I felt like I'd been betrayed somehow. Here I was, planning to move in with one of the best friends I'd ever had. And she'd been making completely different plans.

And now, I see her on Facebook....and she looks so, so happy. She's thin now. She looks great. Even her fashion sense has improved. She is always taking photos when she goes out and has fun. She has all these new friends that she hangs out with. She's always writing statuses about how happy she is now, and how she wished she had moved sooner.
And...I guess I feel a bit angry about it. Because why can't that be me? Why can't I be happy like that? Why can't I be hanging out with her and having an amazing time? How was she able to move on from her depression, while I feel like I'm going backwards? She looks great, seems to have great friends, she has a job and a house. Meanwhile I'm living back with my parents, hate my life, and can't see myself ever being happy. Especially not happy like Karen seems to be. It makes me feel so...bitter.