That's such a helpful response you got, thanks for sharing it 1stepatatime

rainbow8 said: 'Regardless of knowing some things about her, I still have experienced transference because I always wanted her to be someone she can't be to me.'

That's been exactly my experience. I've always thought that if my T hadn't told me lots about her, her life etc then I wouldn't have developed those painful longings for her to be a best friend or whatever it was I wanted her to be.
Perhaps though, when the therapist doesn't reveal much then the transference is easier to work through or with? When they reveal too much everything can end up in a very painful muddle - as it did for me. (Have got past it now though!)