The anger is because no one can be there for me the way I wish they could. My sense of Self is still weak and wants to have someone there to support her all of the time. My mother used to be there like that, and after that there were Ts. I had at least 10 years with no T, but then I was pulled back like a magnet! I attach myself to them because they seem to offer unconditional love and caring, and they validate me. My Self doesn't seem to be able to exist without someone like that.

Yes, I'm grateful for my H, my kids, my grandchildren, and my friends, but there's still a void that can't ever be filled. Age is just a number; I get older but feel the same small child inside. This whole scenario is pathetic. The anger and hurt aren't about my T on her phone anymore. That was just the trigger. The only answer is radical acceptance. Trauma is different for everyone. Mine apparently is this anguish when I don't have "that person" in my life. I'm sorry if this is depressing. My session unleashed all of this anger--again. It's not the first time. It sucks.