Quote:
Originally Posted by tinyrabbit
It sounds like you are dealing with so much right now. Some things I find helpful are exercise (I do a zumba class and find it just helps me release some stuff) and good self-care, e.g. taking a nice bath with some lovely products.
I think you need to talk to your T about the email thing and find out why she's not replying so you don't just imagine it. I know it's hard right now when you're on a break, but it will be over soon. Can you write down some of your feelings so you feel like you're putting them somewhere?
|
I find exercise one of the best ways to help myself too. Do you ever feel so much sometimes that you lose words? That's when I know I'm in a pickle because I have so much going on inside but getting it to translate into words can be impossible (yeah I know that's surprising since I seem to write till forever sometimes on here!). I have attempted to re-establish a diary, but I should work harder at that. Thank you for caring
Quote:
Originally Posted by Perna
Nothing you think or feel should be unhelpful to you. We cannot control what we think and feel and that is a good thing! All we can control is our actions but we should be basing those actions 100% on what we think and feel.
It sounds like you have things a little backwards, trying to control what you think and feel and, when that fails, fearing a meltdown or explosion.
If you are confused, you have to ask questions! That is what confusion is for! Tell your T you have noticed she does not reply to your emails anymore and that confuses you, you are wondering if it is your fault/something you have done wrong, etc. Tell her you do not really mind, one way or the other, but the change itself without knowing the reason, makes you anxious.
It's only what we talk about with another/our therapist that can help us; otherwise we end up just spinning our own wheels in our head and not getting anywhere.
|
Thank you Perna. I'm going to admit I'm utterly confused about feelings and behaviours! Because I thought if a person has negative self-talk they should work to change it? I thought if I'm anxious and yet know it isn't a situation in which to be anxious I should work to push through it and tell myself it isn't going to hurt me. Where does the thoughts and feelings end and the actions start? I feel so often I'm doing the exact opposite to how I feel, e.g. taking on a task I'm not sure about, acting confident when I feel unconfident, staying stoic when I feel really scared inside, focusing on work when all I want is to freak out. I thought that was what I was meant to be doing.
I know that I need to have a discussion with my therapist. I find it difficult as I feel there isn't always time with 50minute versus a whole week and then ultimately we never resolve anything so we have to "leave it till next week to talk about it some more" but then what do I do with the anxiety in between?! It physically hurts! (btw this isn't the main reason I find it difficult to discuss stuff like this with her but that is a whole other topic!).
Does anyone ever just get pissed off with life?!
!!