I got up too late again and the doctor's office was closed again; have to wait till Monday to call. (night schedule; got up at 4 when I meant to get up at 1.) Oh, well.

My thoughts again tried to plague me with "Carol, you loser. Why can't you do this right? blah blah blah."

I had trouble going out again, too. My anxiety and rage about having to sit near a bunch of young men on the buses is coming to a head. Ani wants to have me go thru a "graduated desensitization" on this.

I think it's because my anger at being abused is coming to a head. I am pretty sure it had turned into bpd by the time I became an adult. I pray by venting it safely and doing DBT it will get better.

safe weekend,

Carol