Rose- do you have any kind of therapy at the moment? I think i remember you saying (on the New Member Intro board) that you have an overeating problem?
I really think that therapy would benefit you greatly.
I have had a major problem with various eating problems, and more recently a mix of Bulimia and Overeating/binge eating. But not only has the therapy that i attend helped me with the physical act of using food as a coping mechanism, it has also really improved my body image issues.
I too had an idea that 'I am only beautiful and acceptable if i am skinny' mindset, and while i am not totally out of that yet, i am getting there.
Maybe you could benefit too?