We pretty much have tried the solutions we can agree on and have vetoed ones either of us have an issue with. That's why I'm looking for outside advice and you all have been wry helpful.

I do feel a bit of rejection over this as well as feeling like I'm not good enough, where I'm open to pretty much everything and have a high sex drive. Where his is lower for him to choose porn and masturbating makes me feel not good enough when I know I am and it hurts and is frustrating. In general I have no qualms about masturbating and porn, in this situation it's different.