Bloem: It's hard to know for sure if she'd ever come back to read your posts but if you asked her to respect your privacy and not read them wouldn't she do that for you? I guess you have to trust her until/or if she ever gives you reason to doubt.

Hankster why do you propose that a T's work here on PC "accomplishes nothing"? How would anyone know something like that? (I just say this as a thought not accusatory) I would beg to differ on that point. I've read some very worthwhile posts and threads here on PC. I'm sure some insights came from T's who are very knowledgeable in their field. Insights, the cost of which, far exceed the equivalent of seeing a therapist for months or maybe even years. I've seen an outpouring of comfort offered to people by both the general public and therapists. I don't know about you, but I've been on the receiving line of such comfort and it has helped me enormously. I don't find PC to be a replacement for T or the interaction offered within a T session. I do find PC is a great place to raise questions that come up with T. I've seen so many varied interpretations of what someone says or writes here about a problem or statement that it definitely causes me to question "where did they get that from?" For myself, I know that I'm seeing things one way through the viewfinder but someone else here on PC points out a different view. It is something that I think about long after reading it in a post. Our histories, habits and mind processes hold us back from instant change. I would have to say that I am sorry to anyone who may have offered me great advice here which I did not "take". However, I suggest that perhaps the thoughts you related did not go to waste. They may have been absorbed by another reader (a lurker as the PC crowd would call them). Or, perhaps, I myself would walk away from the computer and think about what someone said. Maybe I'd come back later to reread something again (if I'm lucky enough to find it ). I find PC to be a wonderful friend for me at 3:00 am in the morning when there's no one to call and I can't sleep. I'm sure I'm not the only one. Well, I guess I've really gone off track here and I apologize for that.

What was the topic? Oh yeah, about telling T she means a lot to you. I think that is something worth saying regardless of how they respond to you. I think that it is a beautiful compliment and a testament to the person you believe they are inside. I know we pay our T's for their time, intellect and attention but when they affect us so deeply, why hold back? Sharing the love can't be a bad thing can it? This world has gotten so cold and rotten, it pleases me to hear that you would say this to your T (I said it too once).