I just want to add that transference isn't all about unmet needs - because much of it is positive!! - which is why so many of us are able to have meaningful and loving relationships. It doesn't have to be analysed or pulled apart - if it works then don't fix it!!

However, for many of us who didn't get what we needed as babies and children, it can lead to disasterous and painful adult relationships and great insecuries - and that is where a transferential therapy can really help us to work through and understand how we relate to others - and in that is love and all that means to us.

My own therapy has allowed me to love as I have never loved before and, in turn, to be able to receive love like I have never known - and it is very real in every way. It has healed me for sure.

The most horrendous thing my therapist could ever have done to me would be to have acted out the erotic parts with me when they came along - even though, at one time, my fantasies were that I needed that - the merging that we feel during an intimate sexual relationship (and also in mother's arms).

Moon xx