I'm sorry some of your most precious belongings got ruined in the flood, rainbow

You know... I know I have some maternal transference going on with my T, with some of the strong attachment feelings, etc.. but I still think that beyond that I still love and appreciate her as a human being and for who she is. And I do think I know something of who she is

I went to my first meditation class today. It felt very much like hypnosis, to me. I've not had much luck trying to meditate on my own, but today was good. The last few times I've been under hypnosis I've tended to feel spaced out afterwards, but today I felt more grounded.. I don't know if that's because it didn't take me to quite the same place, or if it's that something else was different. It relaxed me a LOT.. but I haven't been much use for the rest of the day! Came home, had something to eat, then fell asleep for a few hours. Maybe I needed to really rest?! I haven't been sleeping soundly lately.

I've heard from my T quite a lot this week.. some emailing back and forth, nothing lengthy but just really sweet positive messages that have made me feel cared for. I appreciate that so much. I'm feeling safe and secure in the relationship, like I was starting to feel last year, before we had the ruptures and attachment/rejection issues and push and pull that seemed to get into what seemed like an endless downward spiral! I'm so happy that we made it through to the other side of that. I'm so happy we gave each other that chance. I feel like now I am truly on my way to 'growing up' and being able to 'fly', and that T is there to support me, rather than feeling panicked and like I'm being pushed out of the nest!

Focusing on the positive. Feeling good