I am so sorry this is happening to you. I can's expalin to you why he does this. And I do understand that it does rob you of your time with him for sex because his needs have already been taken care of.

I wish I could explain it. I can't, but I do the same thing. I like what I like. I also like what me and my H do. He doesn't do it wrong, our sex life is good. I also also know when I go it alone it will delay when he gets it again. I am sorry. It is his body and he should not be able to tell me what to do w/ it. If he said no more solo sex unless it is w/ me or approved by me, is not fair. That sounds like what you are asking of him. It is his body and he doesn't need your OK to do for himself. I hate when My H asked when did I last do, how long has it been, I don't like to lie to him and it puts me in a terrible position. Do I lie to not get fussed at or do I tell the truth in the name of being honest and risk hurting his feelings and letting him down again.

Could it be, that solo is what one is accustomed to before a relationship and it is that self love that one misses. When I do it , it has nothing to do w./ my H. It is not against my H or to spite my H. At the moment it is about me. But it does affect the frequency w/ my H. I don't know what the happy medium is there. Sorry.