The upside is fairly easy to see. Have you seen others battle their addictions and get sober and get everything back? It can happen for you too. When I got sober, I hadn't lost everything, I hadn't gotten a DUI etc, but what I realized in the beginning was all those things were a big fat YET. The yets kept me coming back and still do. I went to meetings and took it one day at a time. I know have over a year and a half sober. I absolutely LOVE my life today. LOVE IT....seriously, it's a great life and you can have it to. The best way to get sober is NOT to do it alone. Find other sober people, either going to meetings or something. Living a more active lifestyle and having someone drug test you? Hmmm, that's a beginning, but just something that simple won't do it. Those drug tests won't detect alcohol, so how will you stop that? That guilt you're feeling is normal, but as you clean up your side of the street, that guilt fades. How did I clean up my side of the street? By working the 12 steps and helping others. If you're willing, it works like a charm. You can do it!!!!