This is what I meant in a previous post about waiting to hear what you want to hear. You want your mum to come to you, arms open wide and to be all fab. You need to stop thinking this way, sorry, its beating yourself up and pointless. We cannot control what other people do, you cannot control your mum's actions, you can only control your own. It's probably one of the hardest things to grasp and I do feel for you. But I think you have little choice now, sorry to be blunt. If your mum comes back, fine, but do you really thing that the best way to live your life is to stop living and put everything on hold, just waiting for your mum to do something she may never do?

You really do need to get some help, get yourself off to the doc as soon as you can as I am concerned you're heading for a serious breakdown. Please get things back on track and concentrate on the little baby coming along. That little thing should be the most important thing on your mind right now and please stop letting your mum take its place. He/she will be a lot more vulnerable and need you a lot more than your mum - and should be a happy time too. Please do not let her behaviour spoil that also.