Forgiveness follows acceptance. You cannot forgive what you have not fully accepted. I did some horrible things as a teen, wayy out of control compared to my peers, and looking back, major hypo episodes involved. Did things I ended up being ashamed of, things I didn't understand because it was so out of character, opposite to what my principals were, and in the opposite direction of where my moral compass was pointing. I hurt and lost friends, I was chucked out of my house numerous times before I turned 18 (only to be saved by blessed eldest brother RIP) and guess what slowed me down, gave me the sense of "control" I needed to not repeat those drinking,drugging and immoral ways?... I had an unplanned pregnancy at 19. Honestly a Godsend.

She made me determined to be a good example, and so far so good, I stay out of most kinds of trouble, save for spending outrageously and anger problems.

Anyway, I was no angel, maybe I wasn't a prostitute or addict, but I had my fair share of shame to deal with. At first I denied all my wrong doings, or played it down to seem like innocent experimenting and therefore acceptable, but the truth was eating me up inside...

So... I cut out my shame gland, it wasn't a very useful part of my anatomy to begin with anyway.

I conciously decided that the past was the past, this is now and the future is unknown. I can't change the past, and maybe I shouldn't if I ever had the chance because it shaped the me I am now.

The me I am today is a good person. She's wise beyond her years, intelligent, empathetic, and has such a vast range of experiences she is able to relate to almost any situation someone else may be needing help with. She is kind hearted, non-judgemental, eager to help those in need. So how can I really hold my past against me?

I've accepted that I did some fkd up stuff I would never want my daughter to do, but I've forgiven myself for it. Regret is much too heavy a burden to bare, besides, it doesn't match any of my clothes

I know this is not a religous or spiritual topic, but when I was struggling to forgive myself, I said to me... If God can forgive me, who am I to say He's wrong about me? Who am I to say that I am unworthy when He has already said that I am worthy of forgiveness? How can I override His decisions / judgements?
That train of thought was life changing and liberating, and I'm not even a devout Christian, I'm merely a simple believer.