I think for me, when things stack up, the frustration rises to the surface easier. Like if I have to deal with a slow car, a demanding person, time pressure, bad weather, etc., and all of it builds, I feel like Im just not adequate enough to deal with all of it and its unfair that others expect me to. Having dealt with it poorly in the past sets the course for doing the same thing over and over again.
During my cooler times I think about how irrational that is. I try to think through the reality which is these things happen to everyone and not everyone loses their temper over it. I try and tell myself these are normal situations that occur everyday to a lot of people so it isnt life being against me. Then, when those things line up again and taunt me, I have the rational understanding to turn to. That helps me keep from getting so angry.
I really do want to be a decent person too. Wanting to be is the first step to becoming I think and I think we have to give ourselves credit that even though we arent perfect in every way, we're trying and someday, if not perfect, at least we'll be able to handle this better and avoid as many unpleasant experiences as possible than if we just ignored it and said 'oh well', or worse, acted on our anger and someone gets really hurt.
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Originally Posted by bharani1008
I think that being depressed uses so much energy that little things get us down easily. When something seems to go wrong it means we have to take action to correct it. That entails concentration and effort. If our store of energy is being used just to maintain then yeah, you get irritated. I also think that our level of frustration in life is also at a natural high since we don't get our needs met. That also makes one irritated. Perhaps you can just give yourself permission to be frustrated and irritated for a few minutes-- then let it go.
I'm a victim of jealousy too. Haven't found an effective coping mechanism for that one. I hate it. It makes me feel so petty. I really do want to be a decent person and that spoils it  .
If you come up with a good way to cope with jealousy please post it. |