((LisaDoe)),

I am glad you were brave enough to open up and share this challenge. You are not alone with this problem.

Lisa, sex really "originates" in the brain and when the brain isn't "receptive" it is very "hard" for a woman to be able to actually enjoy her "sexuality".

What you are struggling with right now is that because someone has "violdated" you, you have confusion about being able to actually allow yourself to be ok with trusting and enjoying your body and your sexuality. You are "apprehensive" about sharing that part of yourself and being "ok" about it with your husband, whom you "really do love".

However, sex is more than what we think about it as being, how we tend to put it into a should be "meaning".

What you need to work on, "because you do love your husband" is to understand how to be "ok" to break free and "love him completely and allow yourself to enjoy him" sexually as well. Sex, is very good for the brain. The entire brain lights up and is stimulated more than any other thing we do with our brains. And when a woman "loves" her partner, her "entire enjoyment in sex" is even higher.

Rape is "different", rape has nothing to do with what you and your husband have together. Rape is about someone taking something from you, you didn't agree to that.
So, you need to understand these two things are not the same.

Your husband "really loves you" a rapist didn't love you, big difference.

You have to slowly learn to "work on" allowing yourself to learn how to "own yourself" and "enjoy "love" with your husband". You deserve to allow your brain to completely light up and understand it is good for you and even more so because you are with someone you really love. You have to understand that "your husband is loving you, you are loving him" and this is entirely "different" and you are very lucky you found a man that you love and the two of you can be together in this way, because it is the best way for a woman to be with a man.

You need to allow yourself to "be ok" with your husband because "you honestly deserve that and it is "right". It is amazing how a woman is designed, truely amazing and how much more "receptive and rewarding sex is with a man you love" and it is far removed from anything else. You and your husband truely deserve to love each other all of each other and you do deserve that. It isn't about "allowing" either. You are both supposed to "love and enjoy each other" you really are.

You need to focus on taking your own body for "yourself" and understanding that you have every right to do just that. Your body is yours, take it over and "love your husband", its ok, it really is.

(((Hugs)))
OE