Same here! :\

Good luck to you, too!

I found a good introductory Level 1 (15 credits, whatever that is all about) course (module) to counseling which I'm very interested in, but just thinking about it is giving me so much anxiety. I need help really, I need someone to help me get onto the course and just support me and make sure I'm doing everything right, much like when you get your own place, struggle with stuff, and have a support worker to guide you. I feel a bit stupid wanting to get into that field when I'm so messed up myself. >.> I'm sure it's common, but I can't help but to feel like a hypocrite and a fool.

THE FOLLOWING GETS A BIT DEPRESSING, but nothing extreme:

Also, thinking about it more, I've only just started getting help for severe OCD that I've had my entire life, so maybe I'm jumping the gun? Should I just wait until my mental health is a bit better, and I have my own place, and some security in myself and life? The problem is that I'm already almost 27; I feel like I'm wasting valuable learning years. I screwed school up, I screwed college up twice, then proceeded to screw up the interview for the third attempt at college. I know that was all years ago and I was a wreck, but I just feel like such a failure, like I'm being an idiot to remotely think I could get something like a degree. :\ Ergh.

The really frustrating thing is I keep getting told I'm clever and capable of doing so much, and to some extent I feel the same way, but I'm so angry at life and certain courses in my life that have made me the way I am. I wish I could turn that anger and resentment into a good thing. Basically, I feel like I'm in a wheelchair, being told "You can get up and run anytime you like!" Does that make sense? :\