A really good thing to try in therapy is telling your T that you were disappointed in his/her reaction, and seeing where that leads you. While maybe it works for some people to "hope" that they get what they want from their therapists, or to just switch therapists every time s/he does something that is disappointing or upsetting, my experience has been that I need to really *communicate* with my T about what doesn't work for me. I think that many times, the line between a good and bad T is that a good one can listen to your criticism or complaint or whatever you want to call it, and try to do differently to get it closer to what you need. I have discovered that it is incredibly healing for me to be able to say that I was disappointed or upset or whatever, and then explain why. It's a skill that has served me well in other intimate relationships where better communication has resulted in better relationships.

You explained it really well in your post here, in terms of what you were looking for and how it was different from what you got. You can tell her this, or print out your post and just hand it to her to read.