Thank you for being so concerned. It gives me a very pleasant warm and fuzzy feeling, but *sad smile* things are very different where I live. There is no crisis line and the ER would hardly care about a suicidal young adult. Suicide is a social taboo much more than it is a medical concern and if I told people how I feel I would probably get disgusted looks and angry comments only. Mental illness awareness is very low and the common belief is that you should be able to deal with your problems on your own. Otherwise you are considered either weak or dangerously out of control.

I don't think my position is that dangerous to tell the truth. I am a part of this society after all and I don't like to admit that I can't manage on my own if it can be helped. The urges are very mild and passive. I'm still hoping that they might go away soon. I'll be seeing my pdoc in two weeks. I'll tell him and see what his thoughts are. My meds might need tweaking a bit. Keep me in your prayers will you?