Hey guys, I haven't posted on here for quite a while. A lot has gone on but what I specifically want to talk about is the second psychiatry appointment I had... it took me 4 months, just to receive one. In that time I attempted twice.

My therapist, who is AMAZING, came with me... And when we went into the office, I realized it was the same silly cow that I had last time. The thing is, last time she told me "You don't need anti-depressants so you're not depressed, you can go to X or do nothing" 2 days later I OD'd.. That was in September?

So you can imagine my dismay, but oh no. She interrupted me, and wasn't even listening to what I could barely explain because of anxiety. She didn't even notice for the whole session I was sitting nipping my arm hard just to deal with the stress. She didn't officially diagnose me, but I've been told by.. 3/4 mental health professions that it's borderline... Keep in mind no OFFICIAL diagnosis... She turns around and says to me, "Oh well, you are much further along than others with BPD, you have actually accepted your diagnosis. You just need to make a drastic change and stop being silly, your an intelligent girl."

When we tried to explain that I have two minds, almost two different personality's in my head, both which are me.. Kind of like a complete split from a young age she said, "You need to stop blaming things on the other you." WHICH ISN'T WHAT I DO! I take full responsibility for ALL my actions.

She didn't bother listening to any of it, said I was bright and pretty much that I should know better, that she won't refer me to impatient. It felt like she had no time or patience for me, she also seemed rather peed off that I had had previous attempts. WELL I'M SORRY I FELT THAT WAY.

When we left, my therapist even seemed disheartened... I get bad dissociation and my minds so complex, and stuff that it's hard to keep up with. She said that the psychiatrist had a very, "I'm the doctor, so I'm right attitude." She just seemed extremely uncaring and made it seem like because I knew what I had an "accepted it" that I didn't need the help. My therapist also said, "Yeah well, she isn't the one who has to live with it." As in, daily struggle of BPD.

I was just wondering if any of you's ever experienced similar stigma from mental health professionals? I just feel like that if I went in there with symptoms of bipolar they would have treated me. x.x; Or am I just being completely stupid?

So angry.. Thanks in advance...