I understand that the title may seem insulting, but I don't intend for it to be. I decided to post here today because of my recent struggles and the suicide of a person I know.

I've never been suicidal and I don't understand the desire to end one's life unless they are terminally ill. Despite sadness, I think that life is precious and worth fighting for.

My mother's ex committed suicide this weekend because he didn't feel that he could cope with Bipolar disorder. In December, my mother attempted (I was around to save her, thank God), for struggles with her depression, our estranged relationship, and bereavement over my sister (also mentally ill, accidental overdose). She has been very mentally ill my whole life and every year it increases in severity.

Despite years of therapy and lifestyle changes, I still struggle with anxiety, panic, depression, loneliness, and an unstable self-concept. I have a lot of difficulty in my interpersonal relationships as well. I've been feeling lately like my family, past, mental disorders, and INFJ personality enable an incapability to ever thrive in this world. I feel that maybe I'm just an ill person who will never be stable or happy and who will only get worse. I feel unlucky, damaged, and cursed.

Lately, I just want to give up on being normal and interacting with others. Does anyone feel this way? Other thoughts?