Thank you for the advice. I had anohter experience yesterday that started as a school function for my daughter, a family dinner in a restaurant, grocery shopping and then a barrage of accusations and insults ( I left her home immediatly) , followed by a short midnight phonecall (why did I pick up?) , a couple vicious text messages..and then an apology for one of the really low blows via text message in the morning. After that it was all business as ususal-as if nothing happened. Picked up my daughter after work and she offered me dinner but was as distant as ever. I did not say anything, I was pretty uncomfortable. Ugh--our 15th anniversary is on Sunday-- I want to acknowledge but not come on toooo strong. I thought 15 Roses and just a simple card, I thought about just writing a line from a beatles song "Who knows how long I've loved you?You know I love you still..Will I wait a lonely lifetime? If you want me to I will." --I know it's sappy, but I want to remind her that I am still here. She made an appointment with her therapist--so I think she knows something is not right. unfortunatly that particluar therapist had her convinced previously that she is not bipolar (unlike the three psychiatrists who talked to me after her last episode) but that she may have PTSD from all the abuse she suffered in our marriage. So I think part of the reason she likes seeing her is because she is telling her what she wants to hear. Anyway--do you think I should give her roses or is that inappropriate given our separation and situation? Her mother keeps telling me to let her know that I love her and to give her space.