Social anxiety is not easy to live with. I have lived with it for 64 years, and was able to have a career; surprises me today to look back on those years. But, over the past 4 years I have worked very hard with my psychologist to gain ground and have been successful in many but not all ways. I isolate much less than before, a good thing.

I still hate living through a day and hate seeing the sun come up because it means I must see my way through another day, if it would just stay night all the time

If you don't already see a therapist, my suggestion is to find one and get to work. You will be a much happier person. Don't wait until you her gray hair, quit working and discover you have nothing but four walks and a TV.