There's nothing wrong with anyone's individual responses. I "trade" services too, Rhapsody, I get my husband to watch TV with me (shows he doesn't like) or read aloud to me in exchange for rubbing his foot (he injured it when he was 16, almost didn't walk again, damaged nerves and now they go berzerk often, creating pain which only my massage helps :-) You hit the nail on the head with the 100% to 100% but I think both people have to agree 100% of what behaviors. Everything needs to be negotiated and not negotiating but just assuming the other person "owes" you is not a good way to go. I think that's what Spazkatz's boyfriend is doing, trying to guilt her into sex. Not a "loving" act on his part?