Quote:
Originally Posted by amandalouise
your post says it upsets you when you encounter people who say they do not want to heal do not want to integrate....
let me ask you a question....
think about someone special in your life...do they like the same things you do, do they do the same things you do, do they wear exactly the same clothes you do?
for me integration automatically happened as I worked out my problems.. the big bang you are integrated with the help of a therapist wasnt something my treatment providers and I worked to do.
it focuses instead on treating problem areas/issues. focuses on the host not the alters....solve the problem and every thing else will fall into place...
my culture believes integration is the literal definition of the word ...taking in, processing, intermingling of people, places and things....
how do all these translate / are relevant to DID....
in my culture integration isnt totally about alters and host becoming one. its about learning you have a dissociation problem, learning what that dissociation problem is, letting yourself feel when you are dissociating, connecting to people places and things around you to help you become more grounded, acknowledging you feel numb, and other dissociative problems. knowing the alters are there and accepting they have their own jobs, purposes, reasons for being just like the host has their own way of being so does the alters., working on your problems whether they are related to having DID or work or what ever else there is...
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I didn't mean for it to sound that integration is the only way. I mean that it upsets me that they aren't on my path and they're saying I'm wrong. I feel judged by them. It also upsets me when I see people glorifying DID like it's some wonderful thing to have and it makes them more special than anyone else because they're unique. I read their blogs and comments as that as they publicize their alters and make drawings of their inside world. . . it just for me it violates that privacy and secrecy of that inner world.
Also I want to share that we (my psychologist and I) are approaching the dissociative symptom in a similar way. Right now for me that's the biggest issue in my life. PTSD is too but I can't handle that work and so we're working on building on skills that can help me remain present. What you describe sounds like being mindful. There's six things that we're learning to do to be more mindful and take in our surroundings and what's happening without judgement. Being mindful is the opposite of dissociating so that's where it helps. Right now I'm still struggling with staying in my day and if I'm triggered I'm gone for days on end. I'm not really dealing with big issues in my life since I left my parents' dictatorship. Life is actually really good for me right now. If I have something come up that needs to be addressed we deal with that but ultimately we're working on learning the skills found through DBT so we can stay balanced in our perception of the world around us.