Quote:
Originally Posted by Britneigh
I'm getting to the point where I'm about to give up on everything. Give up on this forum. Give up on horses. Give up on my relationship. Give up on my job. Give up on my future. And give up on life. Give up on ever trying to be happy. I just don't know what to do anymore and just when I think things might be okay it all blows up in my face. Full out explosion. And why? Because I don't know. I'm never going to be good enough or smart enough to do anything but shovel crap the rest of my life which is pretty pathetic. I'm feeling really down. And nothing makes me feel better.
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I know this won't help, but it's important to remember and you know deep inside that it's true. The most insideous thing about BPD is when you are down, good times seem like a distant memory even though they may have only been hours, days earlier. When we're down, we're really down and nothing seems like it will ever be right again. The same thing happens when we are in a good mood. When we are in a good mood, even though we don't experience them as often as we'd like, we are on top of the world as though nothing was ever wrong. This is part of the black and white thinking and it is horrible.
Just remember that the bad times don't last; it will turn around if given the time. Remember the BPD motto, so to speak: "Everything will pass." I know that doesn't help when you're caught in the middle; I know how horrible it can be, but take some comfort knowing that others understand.