That is a difficult and unpleasant situation you are in, especially when your husband insists on being part of the problem and not part of the solution.

What I can see in what you said about your husband's conversion disorder is that it serves a purpose for him. You break your neck to take care of him, and feel too guilty to leave him because he is sick. That's a pretty big payoff for him, don't you think?

When you have a loved one who refuses to get help for their problems, sometimes that best way to deal with it is to get therapy for yourself. It can help you to cope with the things that fall on you, and strategies for dealing with the challenging person (or people) in your life. Maybe you could get him to join you for a "couples" session, and the therapist could talk him into going further from there. Or maybe it will help you to clarify your options and decide what is best for you.

I know that money is tight for you, but look into free or low-cost therapy based on your income.

TC,
Rap