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Originally Posted by Sam2
The lady in question is very intelligent, highly driven and a friend of the family. Still, I don't think she would respond to any direct questions as far as seeing if she is having problem with an eating disorder. How does one approach someone they are concerned about?
Sam2
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First of all, it's great that you want to help your friend. Sometimes people are afraid to do because they don't know what to do, so they do nothing. What I would suggest is just being up front about what you've noticed (since she is, as you say, intelligent and highly driven, she may take anything else as an insult) and then letting her know that you are there for her if she ever needs to talk. That's really all you can do: let someone know that you are there for them. It might plant a seed, if she's not willing to open up right away. I would just be prepared if you do say something, because her initial reaction may be one of anger, especially if it's an eating disorder. (I say 'if' because there's a very small chance that some kind of illness may be causing her to be underweight? If not then ignore this.)
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sam2
Secondly, when I was looking over some sites on anorexia nervosa, I was shocked to find that there are sites that "teach" people how to become anorexic. Never mind that it is cruel and a really bad idea, can people really make a conscious decision to become anorexic and carry through on it? I wish those sites were illegal. From what I have read, trying to come back from anorexia can be as hard and trying to break an addiction to heroin. Why would anyone want to try and entrap others?
Sam2
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It's true that some people view anorexia as a lifestyle. Having an eating disorder can instil a sense of control in people, give them a sense of purpose, something to strive toward. But the bottom line is, if a person wants to follow an eating disorder, they'll follow it. What I mean is this: when I first engaged with my ED, I was 15. Ironically enough, it was after I read an article outlining a girl's struggle and how she survived and recovered from her ED but just barely, and how the same ED killed her best friend. For some reason, what I got out of that article was, Hey, here's a way to not gain weight. And I've been struggling ever since.
The average person would have read that article, felt sympathy for the girl, her family, and the family of the girl who died, maybe been grateful they didn't have an eating disorder, maybe been saddened by the memory of someone they care about struggling with an eating disorder. But not me. For me it was an 'in'.
Hopefully your friend is not one of those who practices it as a lifestyle. I wish you the best and would like to hear how it goes with your friend.
