I find this very interesting. I have experienced this for many years. I call them my compulsive suicidal thoughts. I remember telling a young nurse about them once and the fear in her face was unforgettable. But for me it just seemed normal, nothing to be alarmed about, sometimes I just think "you should kill yourself", then I don't. Just another part of my day. I don't think she understood, she frantically handed me like a dozen pamflits and fridge magnets with suicide hotline numbers. I took it all to be polite.