Yeah... I quit taking Zoloft when I noticed I was feeling both numb and suicidal, I was like, what's the point in that? So I stopped abruptly... yeah... that was fun... or not... but I did feel better for a while after that.
Ok, how much follow-up should there be with a doctor when an anti-depressant is prescribed? I kinda feel like there wasn't enough the 2 times I got a prescription from GP's, and that's part of why I wanted to see a pdoc now if possible, but I don't know if there was enough or not. I feel really dumb about it now, that maybe I should just see my family's GP, and I'm getting the idea people around here think so, too. I was just feeling really desperate Tuesday, like ok, I'm still alive, I've got to try something before I go crazy - and make it something different and maybe more right than before. Maybe I'm not going for the right reasons, or with any "reason"- logic to it.
I feel so dumb about it, like I'm doing everything wrong, not just this, but lately I've been telling anyone anything, writing emails to the college group leaders, telling a few people at the ministry I used to work at, calling the helpline for that ministry, holding off on, then writing my pastor about this again, not being anonymous or holding anything back, really - I've never been like this before. It feels wrong, like I'm looking for attention or making up problems, and being a major pain. I should have just let it be, wait for my pastor to tell me what I should do, then I could be more confident about it maybe. But who knows how long it'd take to get a suggestion from him... I need to be doing something, I can't deal with nothingness.
Uuuhhh... so nervous. Ok, so one more question... can anyone reading this tell me what I can expect in my first appointment with this pdoc?