It is normal even in abusive relationships to have some good times among the bad. That is what makes us doubt if we should leave or stay. If a guy was mean 100% of the time it would be easy to choose to leave but when they are sometimes nice it makes us doubt ourselves. I understand what you are saying because I have been there.

I thought if I loved him enough everything would be okay. Love conquers all, right? I even bought my abusive BF the Eagles CD with the song, Love Will Keep Us Alive. It turned out to be a lovely song but it was just a song and not reality. I loved but the abuse continued.

I am sorry you are going through this. I wish abuse could be fixed but that was not my experience. You have to decide how you will accept being treated. Nobody else can do that for you. We are here to talk though.