MLA,
I'd have to agree with your husband from the standpoint that he is trying to protect you, support your best self. For me, I have had to channel my own protective adult because the child in me wants to believe that everyone is good and that she would do almost anything to be "good" in exT's eyes, to feel "loved". Protecting myself means no contact, though I have had moments of weakness because I also had deep feelings towards my exT. Distance has brought me out of the brainwashing. There are many layers to deal with, including grief and loss of a relationship.

The TELL website has many great articles and resources that I am sure you will relate to and will perhaps bring you more clarity. You can also email them, they are volunteers from all over the world who have been through what you have.

Hang in there.