(((DH))) so sorry
Trying to think of how to deal with jealousy. It's not good.
Remember before I told you about the ABC therapy my son and I did while he was in Utah? You were interested in it but I could never locate good references, unorganized chaos me of course.
But it might be worth a try:
A - Activating event - like someone at work talking about her wonderful life and how they're taking their kids to Disney land with all their extended family and stay at the resort and have a nanny and not pay a dime. (That would get my mind spinning)
B - your Beliefs about event - like she just loves to brag about her perfect life, especially right in front of me just to make me feel bad, she's mean, evil, hates me, shes got everyone hating me, and im such a loser! (again just ideas where my head goes with things)
C - Consequences of Beliefs - like I am such a loser, hate myself, want to hurt myself, will never be as good as them, hate those people, will never have any friends to trust... Etc.. And then rationalizing if those beliefs could be entirely true. You are not a loser, look what you've made it through. Considering how all the bad feelings are bad for your body..

Hopefully you see where I'm going with it. Therapist explained it much better. Basically you take some time to choose your reaction and beliefs you want to carry, so it ends up empowering you for future upsets.

In urgent care right now - my youngest broke his arm playing soccer yesterday! Now both my boys in casts, what the heck. Will write more later. Love you!