Skooby,
Reading your posts it sounds like you have had a very difficult life, and didn't really have anyone you could trust and with whom you could bond when you were young. Since you didn't get the chance to develop those attachment skills then, you're still struggling with it now and it shows in your lack of relationships and attachment to other people.

I agree with you that a cognitive approach doesn't sound like what you need. Obviously you do think clearly and rationally, at least as much as anyone does (everyone has some distortions from time to time). There is something about pure cognitive therapy, and most cognitive behavioral approaches that just leaves me cold somehow, even though I can see what they are talking about. The pure cognitivists tend to insist that thoughts determine feelings and behavior, while there are others who present a triangle between thought, feeling, and behavior with each influencing the others. The latter view seems more accurate to me, but still lacking in warmth.

What I would suggest for you in terms of therapy would be to find someone who will focus on relationships and emotions. Some approaches to look for might be interpersonal, psychodynamic, and particularly Object Relations or Self Psychology, which both focus on the relationship with the therapist and relationships with other important figures in your life, as well as the emotions involved in relationships.

I hope that you can get one of the opportunities you mentioned in your first post. There are, of course, ways to make a living and satisfy your financial needs without interacting with people. But it doesn't sound like that is what you are really looking for. My impression is that you want to interact with people, but you don't want to be rejected or hurt by them, and you have not had enough positive experiences with people to be able to trust people.

This site can be a good place to learn about relationships. I also was bullied as a child and not accepted as a teenager, and came from a dysfunctional family. That left me without the skills to form close relationships as an adult. It was through getting involved with groups online, first through email and later through this site, that I started to learn those skills. I have had a lot of therapy too, and while I am still sensitive and easily hurt, I am able to work with people and to have close friends in real life (IRL) now.

Best of luck to you,
Rap