(((JonB))) do you have any hobbies?
When I'm coming down, even though it's really hard, I often found myself looking for more spiritual things, and I'm not talking about religion here; I'm talking about exploring myself inside and put it out in a way that I can feel I'm still here.
I cook, write or paint. Maybe that is the time that you can find what you really enjoy.
PM me anytime~ ~hug~