Baker, am sorry that you've been ill. I hope that you are starting to feel better now?

As for your mum, am sorry, but you have to accept this has happened. I know its not easy, I really do, but you are tormenting yourself. You cant change her, or her behaviour and I really do think it would do you a service if you can accept this. It really will help.. Except the fact that sometimes people do not make any sense, even family, no matter how much you can see what is right or wrong. Please stop tormenting yourself, it has little purpose.

Please do things to cheer yourself up too. Stop watching those sad movies! When you are feeling better, perhaps get yourself and your family out in the sunshine. Go for a picnic, walk or anything together as a unit, and enjoy them. I promise you'll feel better if you focus on the good things in life. Keep yourself busy and stop dwelling on her so much. Bit by bit you'll start to let go of the pain and it will get easier, but you have to help yourself - you are the only one who can. Have you make tracks to see a therapist yet?

Hugs.