I'm so down. I feel like I need to DO something. I'm sick of just laying aroung, but I have no energy. Of course what I want to do is cut. Feel the blade slicing my skin, see the blood pouring out, maybe pouring all the bad that's in me out. I hate myself so much right now. I'm sick of hearing to hang in there. I'm sick of hearing that we can find something to help. I'm sick of trying, I'm sick of hoping, just to have that hope squelched by the next depression.
I'm venting here in hopes of just letting some of this anger out. It makes me feel like I'm doing something. I hope it's not hurting anyone else.