Just one thing, Trippin'........what will Jordan do without you? She's going to be messed up for the rest of her life if you check out on purpose, long before your appointed time. You don't want to do that to her. I know life sucks for you right now, and obviously has for some time; it sucks for me too, and sometimes I feel like I'll never find my way out of the sucky situation I'm in.

But your baby girl needs you, and you want to think long and hard about the life she'll be sentenced to if you end yours. I understand how it seems like the only way out; sometimes I want the pain to go away so bad that I find myself on the Internet researching how many Ativan tablets it would take to NOT wake up in the ER with a tube up my nose and another one down my throat.

Then in my mind's eye I picture my husband, kids, and grandkids looking down at my body and crying, wanting to know WHY I did it??? Why wasn't their love enough to make me want to live?

Now.....do you want your child to have to ask those questions and find no answers? Somehow, I don't think so. And if you think about it a little longer, I'd bet you'd find her the best reason in the world to go on. Maybe the only reason. But she's the only one you need.