wow! I just happened on your story and it could well be my own. I have been married to a man with depression/bipolar diagnosed and suppose to be on medication (on and off) for the past 11 years (wow- it was 1995) I can't believe it has been that long. I constantly go through what you are going through with being emotionally out of the marriage but physically here and responsible, guilt ridden and unable to just walk. My husband, as it sounds like your decides he is okay and stops his meds and falls back into depression and then mania, it can be a real roller coaster. I have in the past year and half moved into another bedroom and started trying to explain to him that I wanted to leave and that I was making a plan to do so. I Think for me this is the right thing to do, I can't say for you but I do think that when you are dealing with someone (at least my husband (not sure of yours) who is emotionally unstable you have to take steps and prepare them for the change if you want them to succeed and I do want him to go on and have a good life, but I also want to go on and have a life of my own. I like you, feel tired, worn down and would love to have someone say I will take care of everything and everything will be okay (again I don't know your husband) but my husband will say the words and try for a short while, a very short while and then go on his little mini mental vacation and all the responsibility plus is back on me. Anyway I rambled on and on and could go on for hours. I want out badly and if you are in a situation like mine I want you to get out be happy, live a full and wonderful life, we are not suppose to be anchored and drown by people who are not willing to help themselves. You probably think I'm a nut, well I probably am because I live this life but I wish you well and hope good things for you. good luck