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Old May 27, 2013, 04:47 PM
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honeybee777 honeybee777 is offline
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Member Since: Mar 2012
Posts: 252
My mother and my father divoced when i was very young, my mother controlled me seeing my father, ultmatley put a restraining order on him saying he had sexually molested me, WHICH i cant stress enough, that he did not, it was acutally her father , my grandfather who did, for about 13 years, when she left my father and put this restraining order on him, I had no idea that she had done any of this, so I felt as though my father didnt love me anymore, even though we were very close when i was young and when they dicorced I freaked out, I was 7, at the same time her father, my grandfather came into our lives more, which he started molesting me, for many years, i never tols till i was 13, after i told, I started to have "seizures", which i later found out was conversion disoder, as well as PTSD , HPD, I acted out sexually with everyone, I never knew why I would do it, I would have a very good Boyfreind who treated me good, and I would sleep with his brother or best freind, and wouldnt think twice if he foudn out or not, i was very vain adn shallow, in my teenage year, but I had power over my mother when she found out about what her father did to me, so becuase of the resentment I had towards her for divoring my father , I used that power over her to get my way and from there I felt very powerful, I got into drugs very bad which led me down a horribale road......like they say in NA jails , intustions, and death, after being locked up many times in jail for stupid things, like buglery, domestic viloonce, assualt against apolice offfcier, seeling drugs and disturbution, I realaized that If i didnt try to change, I was going to end up in prision, so i began my journey of healing May 3 2001, I havent used illegal drugs since, got married ahd kids, thought i was NORMAL finally, but the seizures didnt stop, neither did my shallowness, In chruch I met a therapist, who talked to me, adn I began my journey with him in, 2005, where i found out that I had conversion disoder as well as HPD, and PTSD, bipolar 1 , the list continues, I had a nervous breakdown after the daeth of my best friend, where that triggered me back to my old ways, where i had an affair on my husband, he was very mean to me and cold, so I desisded to move on, we got back together for the kids, and as of now Im workign it out, thats my story I hope Ive helped anyone
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