Days of Healing, Days of Joy - a Hazelden book

"In dealing with other people remember the three C's: You didn't cause it, you can't control it, and you can't cure it"......................................Lorna P.

None of us lives in a vacuum. We all live in relational networks called systems. There are family systems, work systems, church systems. We are constantly surrounded by and interacting with others. Some of those "others" have problems. Some of those closest to us have problems.

We often display an exaggerated sense of responsibility - as if we're responsible for those problems getting solved. We this in mind we set out to "fix" the other.

The fact is we didn't cause those problems nor can we control the problems of another, and we surely can't cure them.

Recovery is an intensely personal matter - for us and for others. They will deal with their problems when they are ready, and work as hard as they choose to overcome the problems they face.
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Today, I will allow others the dignity of living as they wish to live.

I think this was written for me. I have always been the consummate "fixer." Anytime anyone had a problem, I was there. I tried my best to help everyone to "get over" whatever it was that was bothering them. I didn't profess to be any kind of "doctor" or nurse or anything like that --- but I just tried to listen, help with common sense, and hope they'd be okay. HAH. I soon learned that I couldn't even fix myself, let alone anyone else.

Then I came across this reading -- I knew it had to have been for ME.