Thinking. Don't want to allow someone too fast into my heart, "world completely yet" so what to do.

They are all so interesting but each friend has his flaws and since I am frightened by each flaw I generally take leave .

This dosen't mean I "Love" someone any less, no, maybe just enough. I have to take care of my needs and my worries keep me up at night. I am B.P. and for me to live ok I guess I have to do what I have to do for my equaliberium.

I used to feel like a ***** having one night stand style sex [using STD protection]but realize with my bipolor and stuff, i can't afford to have breakdowns, don't want to be alone on my days off and need to have fun. I sound cheap but actually i am trying to take better care of myself by limiting exposing myself to what I can't handle. It isn't cold to treat people like that. Codependancy could be really bad don't you agree?