Thread: wifes history
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Old May 28, 2013, 03:16 PM
carolinaguy carolinaguy is offline
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Member Since: May 2013
Posts: 21
Quote:
Originally Posted by Trippin2.0 View Post
I also don't quite understand how something from +14 years ago came up, and how or why it is relevant to your present day life. Some detail might help...

Since you never had any inclination to experience a FFM 3-some, why do you feel robbed of a wild time with your wife? This is a question you need not answer to me, but for yourself, as it may be the clue to getting over this very painful hurdle...

I'm sorry if this sounds unhelpful, but I honestly don't see the problem. Why drive yourself nuts over a past that was none of your concern in the first place?
The answer to this question will also no doubt be helpful in your healing process.

You've had 14 yrs of sex with your wife, so whatever inexperience you may have suffered from in the past has been dealt with by now.

I'm really sorry you are hurt by this info, but IMO, you have to realize that her sexual past really is none of your business. It was before your time and in reality its irrelevant because it doesn't affect you (she never gave you a disease) except for in the way you are allowing it to affect you right now... You have to learn to let go of her past, its hers.

Some food for thought:
If your wife shared this news with you while dating, she would have never had a snowballs chance in hell to walk down the aisle with you, and probably knew this, so was smart enough to keep it secret. If your marriage is good and you are happy, wasn't it a good thing you didn't know beforehand, because the past 14 yrs wouldn't have happened?
Answer:
She was in a text thread with myself and another friend (her best girlfriend) the question of attraction to females came up and she said she always held an attraction to females but had never done anything but the one time. I of course replied with, what time was that? she replied the threesome...
My issue is the fact I thought I had married someone of similar background as I intended. I do not like the fact that another man has done things sexually with my wife that I will not do. Knowing this prior to marriage I asked of her background to make sure I was comfortable with it. I know for some it is no issue. For me it was. Which is why I asked... Also to find out I was deceived in order to get a ring on her finger is not what any husband wants to learn.
I do not lie and do not associate with anyone once I learn I have been lied to by them.